More Waiting

There’s not much to do in a small hospital room.  We’re plowing through novels, enjoying classical music, and sharing an occasional conversation.  There is no stress, no thoughts about what to do tomorrow or next week.  Just interminable waiting.  At least I can leave…go to the cafeteria, walk around the hospital, or (as I did last night)  go home and see the kids.  Ben is still tethered to the wall and most likely will be for the unforeseeable future.

We really hoped that this visit would be different, and that Ben would begin having seizures pretty quickly.  But as usual, God has other plans.  I want to manipulate God.  To make him do what I want him to do.  I want to know what will happen.  When will the seizures start?  What will the outcome be?  When will we be home, and will we find out that Ben’s condition is treatable?  God wants us to wait patiently.

The doctors come and go, telling us what we already know:  “no seizures yet.”   My tendency is to want to treat the doctors like they are God.  I ask all kinds of medical questions, but I know deep down what I’m really asking is, “Will this be all right?”  “What will happen to us?”

I don’t like waiting.

Psalm 40:1 – 3

I waited patiently for the Lord;
he inclined to me and heard my cry.
2 He drew me up from the pit of destruction,
out of the miry bog,
and set my feet upon a rock,
making my steps secure.
3 He put a new song in my mouth,
a song of praise to our God.
Many will see and fear,
and put their trust in the Lord.


5 comments on “More Waiting

  1. Mary Chandler says:

    Oh, Nancy… Still praying.

  2. Bob Ferry says:

    Good to see Ben with that wry smile!

    Becky and I will take good care of Emily during this Friday’s field trip!

    And, oh yeah, Daniel is looking forward to getting a higher grade in Choir as he sung out this week while singing “Love Story” in class!

    May the Lord grant you both patience and for Ben to seize up soon! Quite the amazing murals, I’m thinking he could start anoher career in the summer time!

    Bob Ferry

  3. Jeff Benson says:

    Thinking and praying for you daily – also wishing I could make arrangements to come visit.

  4. Anna Eshbaugh says:

    Ben and Nancy,
    I am so sorry. I wish we could visit as well but we leave shortly for MT. Thinking of you throughout the day, and praying for mercy.

  5. Kristina says:

    Good to see you continue going to God’s Word, even when what He requires you to do is so difficult. There is a promise that the waiting will be worth it in the end! (Isaiah 40) Keep enduring like a good soldier. We’ll keep you in prayer and try to check the blog while we are away.

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